Meet R&B Songtress Rochelle Jordan

Working in the college music industry, I was introduced to Toronto singer Rochelle Jordan about four years ago when I previewed her meaningful single "Shot".  Also known by the moniker Rojo, the beautiful, big haired singer-songwriter has been connected to her Canadian counterparts, Drake and one of our personal faves, The Weeknd. Don't get it twisted though, this lady has been putting in years of work to get her music heard despite her obvious industry connections. 

Jordan began her stint in music like many promising artists, by uploading her songs to the almighty YouTube. After garnishing thousands of hits, she decided to pursue music full time with tours across the U.S., Cananda, and France. Her vibe is reminiscent of early Aaliyah but with a little more edge which is evident in her release aptly titled, ROJO, in 2011. 

Now living in the Los Angeles area, Jordan's 2012 project, PRESSURE, silently garnered critical success and many R&B enthusiasts hailed it as one of the best R&B debuts in a while. Still fighting to claim the notoriety of her peers like Jhene Aiko and Tinashe, Rojo is cutting her own path through the dozens of pretty R&B singers. Check out some of Jordan's pieces below and be sure to support if you like what you hear. 

The Secret Behind N.C's Low Quality, Cheap Superstores

The state that I love dearly and have called home for most of my life is currently under extreme reconstruction, literally. Politics in North Carolina can be a slippery slope and honestly I can not name one politician that I trust to make sound decisions that are in the best interests of the people that they supposedly serve. No political party in the United States is truly favored over the other and each election informed voters are pretty much choosing between the lesser of two evils. The majority of North Carolinians are straddling the line between poverty and barely grasping at middle class status, yet these are the people most affected by policy and laws that have been rushed through the current state legislation. 

Art Pope, of Variety
Wholesalers

To go into detail of the horrific and almost Jim Crow like laws that are being enacted in N.C would be too daunting and may make me bust a blood vessel. Surely the press that our state legislature has received from The New York Times, The Washington Post, L.A. Times and countless other medias has given you some insight into the battle that we are fighting for all of our children, teachers, elderly, our gay population, and anyone not making hundreds of thousands of dollars each year. 

Many of these people find themselves on strict budgets, forcing them to shop at low end stores such as Roses, Maxway, and countless others that provide items that are low quality or just outright rejects from the companies that make them. Did you know that Art Pope, whose company Variety Wholesalers owns Roses and Maxway, is also the deputy budget director for the state under Governor Pat McCrory? The levels of conflict of interest of having Pope oversee the state budget that has slashed funding to education, unemployment benefits, and assistance to the poor are all types of wrong. NAACP's Reverend Barber has done his best to expose the ills of what these policies are designed to do. In essence, when you are struggling to make ends meet you buy cheaper items and guess what? In North Carolina, many of these low quality, cheap superstores are owned by Art Pope's company. 

N.C NAACP Pres.
Rev. William Barber

This is not a knock at free enterprise but it is necessary that the rules of commerce and free enterprise are on a level playing field and not designed by the powers that be to keep the disadvantaged from achieving the same success. I challenge all North Carolinians to check your dollars and spend them as wisely as possible. Refuse to support those who do not support you by purchasing from small and minority owned businesses as much as possible. Hell, is it too inconceivable for us to pool our resources and provide for our own needs? Read labels, research business owners and shops, and choose to spend your hard earned money at places that provide the most good to the communities in which you live. Tell your families and friends to do the same as much as they can. It is past time for us to build our own businesses and communities by funneling our money into the right places. This may fall on deaf ears but as of yesterday, I pledge to support only those that support me. 

The Carolina Chocolate Drops: A Modern Take on an Old Timey Style

If you have an eclectic ear for music, then you would most likely enjoy, the Grammy award winning folk/bluegrass band, The Carolina Chocolate Drops. Hailing from Durham, North Carolina, this string playing group are breaking down genre walls with their modern take on a genre that is not usually associated with young black people. More and more black artists are tearing down barriers on what types of music we are expected to play or listen to. 

Formed in 2005, the band originally consisted of members, Rhiannon Giddens, Justin Robinson, and Don Flemmons. The group found great success with their cover of Blu Cantrell's single, Hit Em Up Style that was featured on their debut album, Genuine Negro Jig. The album reached #1 on the Billboard Bluegrass charts.  Their creative interpretation of the song was hailed by critics as refreshing and inventive(as far as covers go), proving that music really has no boundaries. 

Their latest release, Leaving Eden (2012) despite the stale release is just as imaginitive as the first project. It contains the stand out singles Country Girl, Leaving Eden, and my personal favorite Ruby, Are You Mad At Your Man? and it also showcases two accompanying members, Hubby Jenkins and Leyla McCalla.

To learn more about The Carolina Chocolate Drop you can visit their webpage at http://www.carolinachocolatedrops.com/albums.

A Closer Look At Chris Brown

Let me begin by stating that I do not know Chris Brown personally nor is this an attack on his character. His questionable actions have been well documented especially ever since he went ape shit crazy on Rihanna. Yet he continues to throw fuel to the fire, giving the media reasons to continually stalk and blast his business to the world. He broke a window at Good Morning America, got into a physical altercation with fellow singer Frank Ocean, and most recently threw a rock at his mother's vehicle. You know someone is a bit crazy when they attack their own mama. Does Chris Brown not recognize that he is the Chris Brown, a man that most love to hate?

If he was any other twenty something young male, surely his antics would be chalked up to just being young and dumb. But he is not just an average young man. He is a talented and gifted entertainer that found fame at a pivotal age and has not really been allowed to grow up without having a microscope placed on his every move. This in no way excuses his behavior but Chris must recognize that he does not have the freedom or luxury to just grow into manhood. He gave that up when he decided to seek fame.

Fame has not been all bad for Chris though. Surely if he was just a random man he would have faced severe consequences for his assault on a woman and been sent to prison a long time ago. For that he should be thankful since many others have not been so lucky. His anger or frustration that is the cause of his lashing out must be addressed if there is any hope of him living a normal, drama free life. He is young and has time to correct it only if chooses to surround himself around people that genuinely care for his well being. 

I am rooting for Chris. Not because he can sing or dance and is good looking. I am rooting for him because he sincerely has all the tools available to him to turn his life around for the better. Money, fame, nor success guarantees happiness or contentment. He has found all three of the aforementioned but it is highly doubtful that he truly content with where he is at this current moment. Hopefully Chris Brown learns that what other thinks of him is irrelevant and that there will always be people who pray for your downfall. Regular people that go to work everyday and who strive for better are faced with doubters so with his evolution being magnified for the world, he certainly is no different. 

Another Tobacco Shop?!

All over the south, tobacco shops are springing up daily in mostly Black neighborhoods. The most disturbing element is that these businesses are never owned by blacks but by people of Middle Eastern descent.  Why is it so easy for these sorts of business to open up in areas that rarely have commercial properties? 

The average American is well aware of the disastrous health effects of smoking tobacco, yet these businesses continue to open and thrive despite the extreme detriment they bring to these areas. Most of these owners do not reside in the areas where their shops operate and can comfortably take their profits back to their side of town. By visiting one of these establishments you will find much more that just cigars and cigarettes. They usually openly sell paraphernalia that is meant for harder drugs and may even offer the opportunity to sell a white tee or lottery tickets (serious side eye). 

Until we recognize the harm that these business bring and their lack of support for the neighborhoods they inhibit, the black dollar will continue to be viewed as easy income for those who are not concerned with our well being. Challenging the status quo of behavior is what is necessary to bring about change. 

We must pool our resources to not only start our own businesses, hire those that are often looked over,  and support these ventures by spending our dollars there. Black business owner should go above and beyond to offer quality services at prices that are reasonable. The biggest complaints about small black businesses are their lack of customer service and offer low quality product. Both of these can easily be fixed.

Only when we understand and respect the power of black consumerism will we forge ahead and rebuild the great markets that we are capable of. 

Duke Lacrosse Rape Accuser Faces Murder Trial

As a native North Carolinian, the controversy of the Duke Lacrosse Rape case and the fiasco that followed is freshly minted in my recent memories. How could we forget the lies of then stripper Crystal Mangum that led to innocent college students facing prison time and added flames to the fire of Durham's already fragile race relations. It seemed as though she escaped any definitive consequences for her untruths, however, that bitch Karma soon found her as Mangum is now on trial for the 2011 murder of her 46-year-old boyfriend Reginald Daye. 

Mangum is accused of stabbing Daye in his apartment which caused his death ten days later at Duke Hospital. Opening remarks started yesterday and the trial has already has seen complications. Jurors have come forward accusing each other of inappropriate conversations concerning the case and the negative impact the trial could have on the city of Durham, NC which has seen its fair share of controversies. 

The Crystal Mangum & Duke Lacrosse saga was poignant as it help highlight many of the United States' justice system fallacies including overzealous District Attorneys who prosecute cases based on little to no evidence. The Duke Lacrosse team were fortunate that they had means to hire good lawyers, were members of a reputable university, and had white privilege on their side. Many men, black, white, yellow or brown have not seen these same outcomes. 

Crystal Mangum is now forced to face her demons, whatever they may be, as she stares down the possibility of serving major prison time. The life of this young woman was most likely tough, but there are many people whom circumstances of life are similar who have yet to commit murder. 

Jhene Aiko's Releases Sail Out EP

Leaving listeners wanting more after dropping her Sailing Souls mix tape, Jhene Aiko picks up right where she left out with the recent release of her follow up EP, Sail Out. Her signature ambient and emo tone continues into this project with similar themes and a production style that mimics daydreaming in a haze like state. The softness of her voice weaves perfectly with the sounds in the backdrop and even the lyrics are a directly related  as she continues to share her fondness of ganja and being in love. 

Aiko took care to not release too many tracks as she gets set to release her full length album in 2014. As expected Sail Out showcases hip hop collaborations that include Ab Soul, Childish Gambino, and her go to guy, Kendrick Lamar. Chances are if you enjoyed Sailing Souls, then most likely Sail Out will be added to you playlist since they closely resemble each other in sound and content wise. It seems that Aiko has found her formula and is sticking to it. 

Check out the visual for "The Worst".

Sail Out is available on iTunes here:

https://itunes.apple.com/ca/album/sail-out/id728792658?ign-mpt=uo%3D4

3 R&B Artist(s) That We Miss

Remember having that favorite song that you rewinded (pre iTunes or even compact disc days) over and over again to learn every single lyric? Or that artist that you adored and followed almost religiously? Before artists had Twitter accounts or webpages that gave their audiences the chance to track their every move, most of them remained veiled by mystery. Before this Big Brother era that we currently live in, most recording artist were allowed to keep the focus on solely producing quality music. Let's take a look back at a few of the artists that we wish could make a triumphant return to urban music.

5. Montell Jordan

My era's Chris Brown had to be the Los Angeles R&B singer/songwriter, Montell Jordan. He was the bad boy of R&B during the mid 1990's and is the voice behind the #1 single "This Is How We Do It" which can be still heard at black family reunions and sports arenas around the nation. He had a brief stint in acting with small parts in the film The Nutty Professor as well as Fighting Temptations, which starred Cuba Gooding Jr. and Beyonce Knowles. Jordan may no longer be the force he once was in R&B but he is still pursuing his love of music as the married and born-again Christian is currently the Worship Minister at the Victory World Church located in the Atlanta, Georgia area. 

4. Ready For the World

I feel sorry for the youngsters that missed the jheri curls and music brought to us by the Flint, Michigan boy group known as Ready For the World. They brought us the classic R&B and dance hits such as "Oh Sheila", "Love You Down", and "Tonight" which have all been widely sampled and redone by some of R&B biggest artists including Trey Songz. Ready for the World reached the peak of their success from 1985 until the early 90's. Though they may be gone, they will never be forgotten. Especially when one their slow jams drop and you start grindin' like its 1990 all over again. 

3. 702 

Using the area code from their hometown of Las Vegas, Nevada, R&B trio 702 stayed heavy in my cd rotation. The group featured sisters Misha and Irish Grinstead and lead vocalist Kameelah Williams who attended the Las Vegas Academy of Performing Arts together.  Discovered by comedian, Sinbad singing in the Ceasars Palace Hotel lobby, the group went on to work closely with Missy Elliot. They went platinum and spawned several hits including "Steelo", "Get It Together", and my favorite "I Still Love You" which was produced and featured Pharell Williams. 

We could make a rather lengthy list of R&B artists that are sorely missed but we would rather hear what you think. Comment or email us to let us know who miss in music!

Put On Some Damn Clothes!

We all have those days when we sometimes feel unattractive. Though the tons of reality shows may tell you otherwise, not one person ever woke up looking like they were ready for a photo shoot regardless of how great their genes may be. Whether if it's due to that monthly bloating, bad hair days, or a those pesky pimples that pop up out of nowhere, no one is exempt from feeling down about their appearance on occasion. 

Most black women I know are very particular in our manner of dress, so much so that we spend millions of dollars each year to look and feel our best. From our hair to our nails, the business of beauty is now and probably will forever be an industry that will flourish.  I remember growing up with my mother and aunties ensuring that our clothes were ironed, hair pressed, and that no sign of ashiness was visible on our brown skin. We would not dare walk out the house in our pajamas or with rollers in our head, not just because it looks tacky as hell, but because we knew an elder would scold our ass. 

Nothing grinds my gears than to see a potentially beautiful sistah out and about looking as if she just rolled out of bed without so much as washing her face (or behind).  Women now proudly strut down the grocery aisle in their Hello Kitty night clothes and even rock their slippers as if they are the latest Louboutins. Isn't slipping on a pair of jogging pants, t-shirt, and sneakers just as quick and simple? 

We all may not give a damn about what they wear from time to time. We all get sick or have more important things to think but having a sense of pride about oneself should be a 365 day occurrence. Like it or not, black people are judged by the way that we dress. Brothas with Timberlands and hoodies will be viewed as a thug even if he has a M.B.A. from Yale. The same goes for a woman walking around in her pajamas, for she will also be labeled as a hood rat or food stamp queen. We do not have to be slaves to stereotypes but we must be mindful of how we present ourselves to the world. 

I beg you to be honest with your friends and family by letting them know when they look a hot ass mess. 

Nipsey Hussle Sells Out of His $100 Mixtape

The hip hop world was on fire this week after learning that Los Angeles rapper, Nipsey Hussle, planned to sell his mixtape for $100 each. Although he planned to offer the "Crenshaw" mixtape online for free, evidently the hard copy of the same thing is much more valuable. In a time where a hundred dollar bill is equivalent to a twenty, it is not very surprising that Hussle's supporters flocked to support the artist. Mind you, he only printed 1,000 copies but that is a quick $100,000 for the slow minded out there. 

I can not proclaim to be a fan of Nipsey Hussle's music but I am a fan of his ingenuity and his confidence that his fans would show up and support with their wallets. I've heard the mix tape and in my humble opinion it is not worthy of the price tag but to the Hussle fans out there I salute your diligence especially when you can cop the same album for free. This says a lot about the commitment of music fans and proves that people are willing to pay for music that they believe in. Despite the grim numbers of physical albums being sold, it is likely that when the music is worth it to people they will support it through purchasing power. 

Let's just hope we don't see too many more $100.00 mixtapes in the near future. 

What are your thoughts on Nipsey Hussle's hustle?

Getting to Know: Foreign Exchange

Producer Nicolay (left) and Phonte
of The Foreign Exchange

Hailing from ties to my home state, North Carolina, the grammy nominated duo The Foreign Exchange may not be well known nationally but very soon they will be. Made up of producer Nicolay and rapper/singer/songwriter, Phonte. This unusual pairing just so happens to make beautiful music together. They  along with a team of artists make up this dynamic and musically gifted collective that includes multi-instrumentalist, Zo!, Wilmington, NC emcee Median, and singer/songwriter Jeanne Jolly. 

The duo of Nicolay and Phonte (member of acclaimed hip hop group, Little Brother) are the most prolific despite becoming connected through the power of online. The two met through a hip hop message board while Nicolay was still in his home country of Holland. They went on to create the album, Connected (2004) together before they had even met in person. They are currently on their fifth album release with their sophomore project garnering a Grammy nomination for the debut single "Daykeeper". 

The Foreign Exchange roots are deeply embedded in the culture of hip hop. Phonte was a member of the critically acclaimed N.C based Hip Hop group Little Brother whose other members included rapper Big Pooh and award winning producer 9th Wonder.  

The recently released album, Love In Flying Colors, features Nicolay's signature electro soul production and Phonte's mix of R&B mixed with meaningful lyricism. 

Take a listen to The Foreign Exchange so you can be the envy of all your friends. 

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE THE LATEST FOREIGN EXCHANGE ALBUM

Living Single at 30

Single at 30

Let's face it. There are plenty of women like myself who are 30 or over and  have yet to find true love. It's not that we haven't tried or had a few that made us feel like we may be close but somehow it has failed to materialize into a meaningful and fully commited relationship. Sometimes the realization that our friends and loved ones have been fortunate to find love and we have not triggers momentary envy or sadness. Instead of focusing on what we don't have I find that relishing on the positives of single life is much more exciting and fulfilling.

Not every woman dreams of the perfect wedding or even being married. This misconception is still embedded in society's ideals about women particularly in our older generations who view older single women as less attractive somehow. Single ladies like myself debunk those archaic notions by living life to the fullest and embracing the freedom that being uncommitted allows.


This is the perfect time to date and really analyze what it is you want out of a significant other. The better we know ourselves and what we bring to a relationship, it becomes  more likely that when do enter a committed relationship it will be more successful. Trial and error in dating is natural even if it is also tiring to keep coming up short (no pun intended).

Being single is the opportunity to mingle with different types of men (or women if that's your thing), flirt to your hearts desire, or just party like every day is New Years Eve. Being single over 30 is no longer a mark of shame that it once was. Women are currently more progressive than any other time in history so it is past time that we look at pursuing relationships the same way.

Finally! Marissa Alexander Receives a New Trial.

Marissa Alexander before her arrest. 

A Miscarriage of Justice

While many were enthralled with the Travyon Martin and George Zimmerman fiasco, there was another injustice taking place in Florida at about the same time. Marissa Alexander, a black woman from Jacksonville, FL was sentenced to 20 years in prison for just discharging a gun to scare off her husband who she felt had threatened her. Alexander had never been arrested before and was a documented victim of domestic violence. Nor did she even strike him or anyone for that matter, nevertheless she was charged and sentenced to what most rational people considered an excessive and overtly cruel amount of time.


Despite not receiving much media attention, many people around the world became aware of this travesty of injustice with thousands of them signing petitions for Alexander to receive a new trial. Thankfully the will of the people prevailed and she will be receiving a new trial after the 1st District Court of Appeal ruled that a judge did not properly instruct the jury handling the case of Marissa Alexander, which is a minor technicality.


Though this is great news; it is hardly cause for celebration yet. What the Alexander case did bring attention to was the need to address mandatory sentencing and how such sentences are often inequitable in who is often on the receiving end. The United

States judicial and prison systems are in serious need of revamping due to many laws being too broad with vast disparities that affect the poor and people of color at staggering rates. It is a shame that Marissa Alexander's life had to be an example of what is wrong with the American judicial system.

Tips For Independent Artists to Get Your Music Heard!

It is currently easier than ever before for unsigned and independent artists to get their music or other projects in to the hands of those who will appreciate it thanks mainly to the greatest invention ever, the internet!  Working professionally in college radio over the past few years, I have garnered a new appreciation for the blood, sweat, and tears of artists who desparately wanted their music listened to. 

Sadly many of them saw their dreams shattered due to an industry that has become severely over saturated. At our station we get hundreds of submission per week and honestly most of them are not all that great. Despite all of the terrible stuff we have to sift through, we have been fortunate enough to discover and foster some talented individuals that have gone on to make careers out of music. 

Many of the most talented aspiring artists won't be successful commercially but there are ways to get you music to those who want it. Below are some tips I give to artist who ask for advice on getting their foot in the door aside from having good material of course. 

1. Create a One Sheet

A One Sheet is exactly what it sounds like. It is one sheet of paper that is sent out to all stations, labels, or management agencies that provides the artist's name, title and genre of the project, and a description of the  artist's credentials. It is also good to add photos and track listings that announce material not edited for radio. Think of the one sheet as your minute to impress Program Directors into giving your music a chance so you will want to jazz it up a little. Hardly any Program Directors will read anything over one page so make it count!

FYI: diymusic.cdbaby.com gives great tips on creating effective one sheets. 

2. Build Your Contact List

Seek out radio stations and Disc Jockeys that are into the format of music that you play. It will be a huge waste of energy, time, and money to send your music to people who will just discard it. Talking to contacts to get an idea of what they are looking for first will be beneficial as you build your marketing plan. 

3. Perform as much as possible

Street festivals, open mics, and showcases are all prime locations to get your music heard. If you live in or near a city or area that supports arts and music get your butt in every venue  possible and let them know who you are and what you do. If you are truly serious about performing you must not be shy when it comes to getting your name out there. Not only will you get your music heard but you will build lasting relationships with owners and managers whose support you want behind you. 

4. Go Digital

Music is quickly transitioning to mostly digital formats due to it being more economical and much easier to upload and edit. Join free digital music sites such as Soundcloud, Reverbnation, Facebook and MySpace for easy access to the music you want heard. It is also a good idea to follow and listen to artists that are similar. This will give you a feel for what works and what doesn't as well as many artists tend to follow and listen to artists that already follow them. 

5. Social Media, Social Media, Social Media

As if it wasn't self explanatory enough, you must build upon your social media networks. Twitter and Facebook has made it easier than ever to get listeners with the masses of people that surf the internet daily looking for the next best thing. Many artists create pages but fail to update them regularly which is off putting to fans who want to feel connected at all times. Enlist the help of computer savvy friends to help with the updating if possible. There are also programs that link social media sites together which makes updating much easier. 

These are just a few things that may help you get started in the right direction to accomplishing your dreams. Stay tuned for more updates and tips. Be sure to comment if you have anything to add!

Meet OxyxMoron: A Hip Hop Trio with Soul

On my quest to bring you the best up and coming urban acts, I was fortunate enough to stumble across a trio of brothers that are off the cuff and pretty dope in my humble opinion. More accurately, I was befriended by one third of the Hip Hop group OXYxMORON's Ment Nelson, after hearing and falling in love with one of his singles.  

Hailing from South Carolina, the trio that consists of Ment Nelson, Pedro English, and Tony London, met while attending Francis Marion University where they bonded over their love of music. Dropping out to pursue their passion for it full time, they have steadily began to build a following that has lead them to booking shows with their most recent being at the music lover's paradise of the Hopskotch Musical Festival in Raleigh, NC. 

The vibe of their music is reminiscent of Outkast before they were known to the world as Outkast. Their flows rooted in rural, southern culture but relatable to everyone regardless of geographic location. Their latest compilation, titled The Woods, is basically just good hip hop at its finest. It has the hunger of new artists, great lyrical content, and production that does not reek of the trends of current bounce and shake that ass rap.  

Don't believe me? Take a listen to The Woods by OXYxMORON for yourself and be sure to let us know what you think!

The Woods by OXYxMORON

Getting to Know: Valerie June

Singer/Songwriter Valerie June

Just when you thought that blues had passed on to the other side, there comes along an imperfectly perfect voice belonging to Memphis' native songtress Valerie June. This singer/songwriter and multi-instrumentalist debut release, Pushin' Against A Stone, is a mixture of blues, soul, gospel, along with a hint of bluegrass and folk. Her totally off the cuff style is a refreshing difference in a music world filled with women who usually perform only pop sounding material that lacks real instrumentation or any lyrical depth. 

From her musical styles and influences one would assume that June is much older soul than she actually is. Through her album, you get a feel for a woman who has convictions and who aims to stick out like a sore thumb amongst her peers. The single, Workin' Woman Blues, gives an honest look at her personality and happens to be one my personal favorites. In it she sings about working hard and financial hardships with a sense of humor that doesn't make her plight seem so bad. 

Check out Valerie June and let us know what you think. 

Scary Smartphones

If you thought your crazy Uncle Charles was off his rocker when discussing the evils of technology then you may owe him one huge apology. Smartphones are becoming readily accessible thanks in part to the technology being cheaper to reproduce and they are in the hands of damn near toddlers all the way to your great-grannies. 

Technology brings the world together but placed in the wrong hands it can also be pretty detrimental. It seems that the computer savvy (or creepy depending on how you view it) has found an pretty simple way to track the location of people who use their smartphones to upload pictures to the web! Talk about some futuristic, iRobot type stuff.  

Take a look at the report concerning this new phenomenon and decide for yourself if the rewards of posting pictures through your mobile devices are worth the risk. 

Are Hoes Really Winning?

Bad Girls Club logo

Hoes stay winning lately. It seems that they are getting endorsement deals, their faces are plastered all over television, and they are even picking up the most eligible bachelors in the process. It seems as though the ass shakers and semen buckets have taken over the world. This is what the media wants young girls to believe, that the raunchier you are the more desirable you become, but we are here to tell you to please don't fall for the hype.

To be clear, considering a woman a  hoe is subjective to one's own moral codes, but universally this does not equate to be just being sexually active but more specifically how many partners one has entertained and how many at a given point in time. The phrase hoe can be hurtful but let us be honest by acknowledging that there are plenty who embrace it. These are usually the ones who believe that Basketball Wives or Bad Girls Club are representative of real women and think that 2 Chainz's lyrics are a legitimate source for what kind of woman a man really wants for his significant other. Double standards do exist in the 21st century as far as women are portrayed and we are still held to standards that our male counterparts are not subjected to.

Urban Prep Academy

Culturally our young ones are being set up for failure when they are offered simple images that are representative of a minimal portion of society. This goes for males also who rarely see hard working, blue collar men that actually take pride in going to work everyday and who could care less about wristwatches or fast cars. Our boys are being misled to worship materialism and earning a quick buck over having pride for oneself. For decades black males have suffered due to many factors including lack of opportunities, distribution of resources, lack of education but to me the most severe setback takes place mentally when we as a community do not advocate for self worth or self respect.

The belief that hoes be winning is a false conception and in the great words of Public Enemy, "Don't believe the hype!"

How to Get Rid of a Bug-A-Boo?

                  *WARNING* This post is all in fun and not meant to be taken seriously!

We have all been there. The time you regret giving that certain someone your number or email address due to their constant messaging or calls at random times of the day. They stalk your Facebook and Twitter pages or call at the most inappropriate times of the day.  Like dude, I'm at work so I'm sorry that we can't carry on a conversation at 9 o'clock in the morning while my boss is less than three feet away. They continue the pursuit and are oblivious to your hints of disinterest. Not all of us have the conniption to tell them off even though we may just want to yell "Stop calling my f**cking phone!" Worry not. Below are some tips on how to rid yourself of the pesky Bug-a-boo while doing the best we can to avoid hurting feelings in the process. 

Be Upfront

Oftentimes we make things much harder than they need to be by prolonging the inevitable or over thinking the situation. Be concise and tell them straight up that you are not into them that way. 

Avoid the "we are better friends" talk because this may leave the door open and lead to false hope that one day it may  become more. 

Hit the Ignore Button

This can be a little rude but most people get the hint of when someone is avoiding them when they are sent straight to voicemail a couple of times. 

Don't respond to any emails or messages even with short answers. This way you can have proof that you avoided contact when you seek that restraining order.

Unfortunately this method is not guaranteed to work but give it a try anyway. 

Tell a Little White Lie

Generally liars never prosper but when you are faced with unquenchable thirst you just may have to resort to the little white lie. Make up a fake significant other or have your cousin pretend to be your jealous mate. 

This is sneaky and a bit underhanded but you've reached you point of pisstivity with this nag. Some people only respond to this type of thing though they may hate you in the end.

Block That Ass!

Fortunately most mediums of contact have ways to block bug a boos from contacting you. Use this method as soon as possible to avoid any further aggravation. 


Use your best judgement when it comes to who you are dealing with because some are much thirstier than others and refuse to give up without at least calling your phone private a couple of times. Stick to your guns and soon or later it should pay off.

Leave suggestions on how you dealt with a bug a boo in the past in the comment section and be sure to like A Soul Sistah's Life Blog on Facebook!

The New Wave of Female Emcees: 3 Alternatives to Nicki Minaj

It's no secret that when it comes to women in hip hop only one name has pretty much dominated the music scene recently. Nicki Minaj has turned the female rapper into a commodity that far surpasses just spitting a hot verse while looking sexy.  She has garnered popular success that rivals top musicians of all sounds but unbeknownst to her, her mass appeal has also pigeonholed and reduced the female emcees to becoming just eye candy who can rap (some of them hardly). 

Coming up, I was fortunate to be blessed some of the most prolific women emcees that included Lauryn Hill, Queen Latifah, Missy Elliot, Eve, and scores of others. Women in hip hop then offered little girls like me alternatives other than just being the baddest chick. They were intelligent, forward thinking, and most of all they were beasts on the mic. 

No shade to Nicki or "The Barbs" but we wanted to offer some other options to the female emcee. 

3. Rhapsody
Hometown: Snow Hill, NC
Affiliation: 9th Wonder; Kooley High

This southern belle is a lyrical beast whose smooth flow reminds me of a MC Lyte for the new millennium. In a industry that only sells female rappers as extremely hardcore or ultra sexy, Rhapsody is the perfect medium between the two. 

http://www.reverbnation.com/rapsody





2. Angel Haze
Hometown: Detroit, MI
Affiliation: N/A

Angel Haze went through a lot growing up and as evident in the depth of her single "Cleaning Out My Closet". This Detroit native may be known for her twitter spat with Harlem b-girl Azealia Banks, but with her debut album set to be released later this year on Republic Records, she'll soon be recognized for much more than that. 

http://www.angelhazemusic.com/#!All



3. K'La
Hometown: Gary, IN
Affiliation: Def Jam

K'La has been featured on A Soul Sistah's Life blog before so it's no surprise that she is number 1. After making waves with her mix tape, "The Coldest Winter", K'la has done it again with her latest project, "Everyday People." Yet to set a date on her official release, this songbird/rapper is poised to make a wave in hip hop. 


http://www.islanddefjam.com/artist/home.aspx?artistID=7446

Society Fail: $120 Plain White Tee by Kanye West Sells Out

Most of us are willing to splurge a little bit when it comes to purchases that we really want. A slick pair of shoes or that new smartphone are some items we may pay a little extra for but $120 for a plain white tee is ridiculousness at its best. 

Kanye West's dabbling into the fashion world seems to be quite profitable after his line of plain white tees sold out almost instantaneously after going on sale. Not only does this prove that Kanye can indeed sell water to a whale but that many consumers are in fact hoodwinked. The tees are void of any embellishments so much so that it is barely distinguishable from your regular Hanes tees used for undershirts. At least Hanes has the recognizable little red tag that separates its brand from others. 

Most of us are aware of Kanye's oversized ego which may explain why he thinks it's suitable to sell extremely overpriced clothing but how can one ever justify purchasing such an item that literally holds no value? 

One commenter named Jahmall explains best how I feel about this:

Would You Give Your Partner a Pass to Cheat?

As the millennium progresses so does attitudes about relationships in regards to the concept of monogamy. More and more people are becoming open minded towards the idea that healthy partnerships can include more than two people. Several celebrities have spoke candidly about their eccentric marriages that sometime involves outside sexual partners, yet they remain married and most seem completely satisfied and content with their choices. 

Kirilenko & wife, Masha.

Brooklyn Nets player and NBA veteran, Andrei Kirilenko, admitted that his wife of 13 years, Masha Lopatova, gives him a pass once a year to cheat. Kirilenko's wife is cool with the idea of sharing her husband as long as he tells her about it though like a smart man, he has never taken her up on the offer. His wife is no ugly duckling and has a solid career as a performer in their native Russia. What do you think can possess a seemingly attractive and intelligent woman to offer her man to another like he is a piece of meat and not the man she chose has her eternal mate?

Surely other men or women would quickly jump at the chance to sleep with someone other than their spouse. Like most cheaters, open relationships usually only view sex as an act and not the intimate experience and expression of affection that it should be. Sex is a temporary feeling that can affects emotions despite the belief that sex can be detached. I would find it hard to believe that if Mrs. Lopatova thought her husband would become emotionally attached to a woman he was just "sexing" her lax attitude on monogamy would stay the same. 

Would you ever entertain the thought of giving your significant other a pass to cheat?