How Well Do You Know Thy Neighbor?

Growing up, my family was acquainted with almost every family on our block. All of us kids went to the same schools, participated in extracurricular activities together, and often visited each other homes with minimal fear of any abuse or theft occurring. Adults chastised all the children the same whether they knew them personally or not without any fear of repercussions and closely guarded neighbors' homes while on vacations or at work. We all attended events together and were bonded by the fact that we shared the same street. To me, it was the true definition of a neighborhood.

Fast forward to 2013 where interactions among neighbors seem rare or rather forced. Many people dwell on the same block or sometimes the same building for years without even knowing the name of the people that live directly beside them. You may get the occasional hand wave or request to borrow something but how many of us can say that we truly know what kind of people live close to us? 

Recently my city was traumatized by a mass shooting that took place midday in one of the busiest parts of town. After the shooter's identity was revealed, many of his neighbors came forward to say that they rarely saw him or even knew his name. Not to conclude that because one is private or quiet that they are automatically psycho but as citizens we must look out for each other by at least attempting to become acquainted with one another. 

Looking at the case in Ohio of the three missing girls found living in the basement for nearly 10 years without notice is a direct conflict of knowing thy neighbor. The assailant was particularly well known and liked in his neighborhood but still managed to keep these young women hidden even when he had visitors. In this case, even his neighbors and family that visited his residence had no clue to the secrets that lay beneath them making his crimes even more shocking especially to those who knew him. 

In essence, people have the ability and the right to conceal things about themselves to appear more likable or less creepy but I sincerely believe that as neighbors we have the duty to protect and look out for one another. Despite the rise of self interest and preservation, there are neighborhoods that bond together for the greater good not only after trauma or a disaster occurs. This leaves me hopeful that regardless of the evidence that suggests separatism is growing, many of us still grasp the concept of a collectivist society. 

House of Curves: Enlightening the Masses on Big Girl Love

Kenyatta Jones, CEO of Bella Rene
and star of WE's House of Curves.

Who said that skinny girls have all the fun? 

Kenyatta Jones, CEO of Bella Rene, a plus size couture clothing line, proves that big girls know how to have a good time and are far from lacking in confidence on her WE reality show, House of Curves. Since the first episode aired, I have been completely enthralled with the group of plus sized sistahs who are not only fashionable to the tee but witty and hardworking as well. 

The show focuses on Kenyatta as she chases her dream of taking her Atlanta, GA based plus sized clothing line to New York's Fashion week. With the help of her friends and co workers, Kendra and Sherlinda, as well as Mama Jones (no relation to rapper Jim Jones)who doesn't mind letting the girls know who really runs the company, the ladies are on their way. 

House of Curves offers a alternative to "reality" shows that usually show the beautiful and long haired woman and allows audiences to see that because a woman has a little extra cushion, she does not have to be timid or shy. 

All the women on the show have larger than life personalities, love fashion, and seek to provide a service to women that are basically shunned by the fashion designers that cater to boy like figures. Ladies of all sizes want to feel beautiful as well as comfortable and Kenyatta's passion for fashion seeks to provide for the segment of large ladies that want to dress fierce. 

House of Curves airs Thursdays at 10PM on the WE network. 

Are You Ashamed of Being Your True Ratchet Self?

So you've made it! You received your degree, got that salary paying job you prayed for, and finally moved into a neighborhood where you don't have to lock down your grill at night. You made it out the hood and now find yourself surrounded by and becoming friends with people that you may never would have crossed paths with before.  You know, the ones that love high culture and $150 bottles of wine that taste like rotten grapes. They constantly invite you to plays, alternative music concerts, and other activities that you have absolutely no interest in. You try to fit into their group but find yourself missing the spade games and cook outs that go into the next day or in other words you miss being your true "ratchet" self.

For many of my professional African American friends, there is a fine line between hiding your authentic self at the workplace or becoming a "sell out" by hiding any qualities of yourself that relate to "blackness". We are led to believe that we must tone it down while in the workplace by conforming to standards I believe that we place upon ourselves. I recall hearing a young lady say that she refuses to wear braids to work due to it being a "black girl" hairstyle. By looking at her you can immediately tell that she was a black woman so why would she believe that changing her hair she wouldn't be seen as such?

It is rather bothersome that activities, styles, or mannerisms that are related to some forms of black culture are automatically labeled as ratchet or ghetto. Some think that by avoiding anything considered "ghetto" they can somehow not be associated with people that look just like them but may have chosen a less than reputable path in life. Regardless of what someone address is, their education level, or what high end possessions they own, no matter what you do you will still be classified as ratchet to the small minded.  But my mama always say it's not what they call you but what you answer to. 

It remains that there will always be a time and a place for everything, yet if you find yourself going to great lengths to hide your authentic self, it may be time for a little self reflection. It is past time for black people to be free of what "others" may think and live for yourself as well the people that love you genuinely. Far too often we waste time caring about the opinions of people that really do not matter.

I'll be the first to admit that I love reading, writing, and traveling. I also love Remi hair and Tropical Punch Kool-aid. 

How Many Brian Banks Are There?

Brian Banks celebrating with his mother.

If you never heard of the Brian Banks case, you are probably not alone. Banks was a promising high school football player that was falsely accused of raping acquaintance Wanetta Gibson, who attended Long Beach Polytechnic High School with Banks. Not only did Gibson lie about her rape, she also collected a substantial amount of money in a lawsuit she won against the school district after alleging that the school was an unsafe environment.

Banks was exonerated after following up on an eerie Facebook message sent by Gibson that led to her confessing that she made the story up. Fortunately (or unfortunately) Banks was able to secretly tape the confession and was freed after losing five years of his freedom and any chances of rekindling a once promising career in football. Thanks to the infamous California Innocence Project, Brian Banks was able to reclaim his life though there are likely many others who have not been as fortunate. 

Too often men come up with the short end of the stick when it comes to accusations of rape or cases concerning sexual misconduct. It usually just takes the claims of an accuser to have a man vilified as a sexual deviant, a classification that is extremely hard to recover from. Many vindictive people know that labeling a man as a rapist or woman beater are causes for immediate disdain from the community and has often been the case once such claims are made.  

The progress of DNA research and evidence has led to many innocent people being exonerated but according to the Innocence Project website only a small percentage of the cases have biological evidence that can be tested using DNA and much of that is lost or destroyed after the initial conviction. This means that those who have been wrongly convicted have very little chance of receiving freedom or justice from the same flawed penal system that locked them away to begin with. 

Christopher Scott, president of
House of Renewed Hope. 

Based on the National Registry of Exonerations over 2,000 wrongly convicted citizens have been exonerated over the last couple of decades. Over 75% of those falsely imprisoned were sent there due to eyewitness misidentification and an Ohio State University study estimates that about 10,000 people are wrongly convicted each year. How many others remain behind bars for crimes they didn't commit? 

Christopher Scott, who was wrongly convicted of murder and released after 15 years only when the true killer confessed, continues to help others in similar circumstances that he once faced. He now is the president of House of Renewed Hope, an organization founded to fight for social justice for the wrongly accused and convicted through education, support, and legislative advocacy. Only through legislative efforts to revamp the criminal justice system will we see a better process that prevents the wrong people from spending time in prison for crimes they didn't commit. 

These leads us to question how many other Brian Banks are there?

Chicago: America's Own Warzone

While most around the nation were celebrating Father's Day weekend showering our beloved dads with gifts and plumping them up with cook outs and lavish dinners, the city of Chicago was once again under attack by its own citizens.  This past weekend alone, there were over 26 shooting incidents that resulted in 7 fatalities. Think that number sounds insane? Consider this. During the same weekend last year there were 15 fatalities, making this year's rampage a drop from last year's according to Chicago's Police Department spokesman, Adam Collins.

It is no secret that the city of Chicago, a once revered metropolis is under a lot of pressure lately. From the nationally covered teacher's strike to growing budget concerns, the city is steadily facing insurmountable challenges that hurt curbing the violence that is crippling Chicago's south and west sides. According to the Chicago Reporter, nearly 80% of the city's youth homicides occurred in 22 majority black or latino neighborhoods though they make up just one third of Chicago's population. 

The real question is what can be done to curtail the violence that plagues many minority American neighborhoods that are just like Chicago? Cities and towns all across the nation are facing similar events like Chitown's, but fail to receive the national attention. The escalation of violence both in Chicago and elsewhere forces us to recognize that the root of the problem has yet to be addressed.  Countless marches, vigils, and speeches have been attributed to the issue but little action has been put into place to ensure that we do our best to offer our children a chance at a life free from violence. 

Community efforts are paramount to rebuilding and revitalizing our youth. We must reach them while they are young, provide them with options and alternatives to their daily existence, and more importantly, avidly discourage glamorized lifestyles that are often dangerous and destructive. Depending on politicians has proven to be fruitless and only seem to provide them with more talking points. Communities must look to save themselves by ramping up the old school grassroots efforts that were at their peak during the Civil Rights movement. These include youth programs offered my churches, mentoring programs, and reopening community centers that offer educational and vocational opportunities in a safe environment. 

What do you think needs to be done to help with violence in our communities?

Get to Know: Stacy Barthe

Stacy Barthe

Ambient R&B is steadily growing into an sub genre that has been led by the likes of The Dream and new groundbreaking artists such as The Weeknd, Frank Ocean, and Jhene Aiko. Consumers of urban music have been feed cookie cutter artists and increasingly have to turn to underground musicians to feed that true soul music hunger. 

In comes, Ms. Stacy Barthe, a singer whose soul oozes out on every track that she produces. Introduced to most through her feature on T.I.'s single Sorry, Stacy held her own with the two industry heavyweights (T.I's single also features Andre 3000). Though you may not recognize her name, the Brooklynite is already a Grammy nominated artist and boasts an impressive songwriting resume that includes working with artists such as Rhianna, Katy Perry, Britney Spears, and Kelly Rowland. 

Don't confuse the artists that Barthe has worked with to define her style of music or her journey. Her soulful sound is a far cry from the aforementioned entertainers and somehow she is able to manage fitting her heartfelt songwriting with a diverse range of artists.  Sincerity and straight up deep are descriptions that best fit Barthe's signature sound. 

Released in late 2010, her solo EP Sincerely Yours, Stacy Barthe,   was an intricately personal yet soul stirring example of what finely crafted Neo Soul sounds like. The work easily surpasses some of her contemporaries albums and it was given away for free. Stacy herself considers the project a "persona release" of sorts during a turbulent and trying period of her young life. Though there are traces of hip hop influences throughout the work, the EP is definitively Stacy.  

Fast forward to 2013 and Barthe is signed to Motown Records and has released her second free project titled P.S. I Love You, which features the street anthem Hell Yeah. The single is a modern day take on political soul classics like What's Going On by Marvin Gaye or Curtis Mayfield's Diamond in the Back but with a Stacy Barthe truthfulness added to it. 

You can check out Stacy Barthe's latest single, Hell Yeah below which features rapper, Rick Ross. 

Learn more about this artist at www.stacybarthe.com

Zimmerman Gets Set for Trial

Trayvon Martin

For over a year, George Zimmerman,29, has been adding up the pounds as he awaited his trial date for the second degree murder case of then 17 year old Trayvon Martin. The nation has been enthralled with the case that made media headlines when Zimmerman was not charged in the murder of the young man who was infamously being pursued by a stranger on his way to his father's home after visiting a local store to purchase Skittles and a tea. 

Jury selection begins today in the trial and both prosecutors and Zimmerman's defense team are bracing for a contentious and high profile battle. The case made news once again last week when pictures and videos from Martin's cell phone were released to the public. The ill timed release from the defense proved what was believed to be down right ugly assault on Matin's character. Zimmerman's defense team continued to paint Martin as a usual black thug though he does not have the opportunity to defend himself like Zimmerman does. Many fear that the victim will continued to be victimized despite him being the one that is gone and buried. 

George Zimmerman.

Expected to be a key component of the trial for the prosecution will be an audio clip of police dispatchers warning Zimmerman to discontinue pursuing Martin. Only time will tell if Trayvon Martin and his family will receive the chance for justice that was only given through staunch protests that took place in Sanford, Fl following the release of Zimmerman after the incident. 

A Soul Sistah's Life will continue to bring updates and key information concerning the Trayvon Martin Trial. 

How Cheerios Debunked the Post Racial Theory?

The web was on fire last week thanks to a newly released Cheerios cereal commercial that featured an interracial couple and what appeared to a biracial child. The comments following the ad ranged from supportive to highly critical and oftentimes just down right hateful or full of bigotry. The reactions just proved what many of us are already aware of; we are light years away from a post racial America. 

The odd reaction to the commercial was a bit unsettling considering that interracial couples and biracial children are nothing new. For centuries races have mixed, producing the array of beautiful pigments that make up the human race, allowing for the diversity that makes us uniquely different from one another. Even more disheartening is that so many people thought that by lashing out at a commercial that they would somehow discourage interracial coupling. 

Was it the fact the commercial used a black male and white female that cause the uproar? I wonder if the gender roles had been reversed say they used a black woman and white male would the same overall reaction exist? Or how about an Asian woman and black male? Many have complained about the context of the ad, which shows the husband sprawled out on the couch (lazy stereotype) while the dutiful wife is in the kitchen. Truthfully, the thought of black men being intimately involved with white women has been a point of contention in recent history.  Just research Emmett Till for a little insight or visit a blog site that features an interracial couple to see how the majority of people feel concerning the topic. 

Regardless of the negative opinions that stemmed from the Cheerios ad, the conversations that it provoked afterward are ones that we should of invoked several decades ago. Hopefully more ads will be produced that start the dialogue about race in America. Take a look and let us know what you think concerning the Cheerios commercial.